It's been an exhausting week. Last Wednesday, I got a call that my grandmother may not make it. She was rushed into surgery to repair an ulcer that caused her intestines to rupture. I called Daniel and told him that I needed to go up. Later that day, my dad called back and said that the surgeon did not agree at that moment. I decided to go up anyway.
As some of you know, my family and I have been at odds on a few things since my sister passed. Actually, it's been simmering for a few years now. I just decided that I could no longer participate in the pretend relationships that had been going on. In addition, Daniel and I feel that my parents are the wrong people to raise my niece and nephew. I digress. I wanted to see my grandmother in case this was the last opportunity that I got.
We tried to go up and see her on Thursday, but were snowed in. That day, she ended up having a heart attack that reduced her heart function from 95% to 25%. The nurse told me that if they had not of fought like crazy, she would be gone. I don't know how much she could hear, but when I got there on Friday and Saturday, I prayed with her and over her. I don't know what God has in store, but I hope she's okay.
The thing is, no one knows if she's saved. This is one of those surface conversations that go on in my family. I know she knows of God, but not if she's accepted Christ. I asked my aunt and she's not sure either. So, I really hope she wakes up and we find this out.
Daniel and I traveled back home on Sunday. It's good to be home. I've been working to process everything and it's a lot to go through. I think the hardest part of the trip was watching how my parents are doing with the kids. It was hard to see them going through what we went through as children. On top of that, they were making them stay at the hospital as long as they were there. That went from a few hours to most of the day. Paul is one right now and he had to sleep on a bench in the waiting room. Becca is older and can handle it better, but she's seen so much. Both kids would be better off staying with friends. I asked my aunt if one of my cousins would watch the kids and they had already offered. My parents just will not let them go. It's sad, because right now, both of them (especially Becca) need to be free to be kids during most of this time of uncertainty. It haunts me right now to know that I can't do anything to change what's going on with them at the moment.
Please pray for the whole family. My mom and aunt have to make all the medical decisions for my grandmother right now on top of watching her go through this. Pray that they make the right calls and have peace about their decisions. It's not easy. Pray for Becca because she was depending on my grandmother to be there as she grows up. Pray that my Dad will become the man that God wants him to be. And, pray that if it's His will, my grandmother comes out of this okay.